As a particularly chubby girl, I go through phases of questioning, worrying about, agonizing over this very state. It seems regardless to how far away I can distance myself from thinking about it and diverting my mind to more important or sentimental things, the negative connotations of being ”chubby” just creak back in my life one way or another.
It is hard to be fat and to like yourself. Or, at least, it is hard to be yourself and truly like your fat. Fatphobia, fat-shaming and plain old fat hate are so, so ingrained in our culture that people don’t even think twice about the fact they, instinctively, attach a lower value to ‘fat’ than ‘thin’.
The problem with our media is that it trains people to love things like curves, hips, big breasts and bums, but it doesn’t train you to love your double chin or your stomach roll or your chubby cheeks or even see being ”overweight” as desirable. You should only love the ”desirable” things, apparently. Not the whole of your appearance, just these things alone.
There seems to be a real hypocritical attitude of ”Yes, embrace your curves! But get rid of those thunder thighs, they chaff when you walk.” Not too mention that magazines will talk about the ”real woman” that has curves and belittle other women of different sizes who naturally do not have curves, and very thin frames and no chest at all, claiming that these are not ”real woman” and imply they are ghosts, or creatures of some sort? Belittling this type of woman does not make girls of a bigger weight feel any better, either. If anything, it just makes a large proportion of people feel bad - because there are many a girl who have sizes that means they have no cleavage or they have a big stomach, but not many girls with hourglass bodies and a slender yet voluminous physique.
We are not told to love our body, but to love only some parts of it. We are told what is desirable, and that we should accept what is desirable and what isn’t it. But then we are told to see ourselves as desirable - even after all this confidence crushing bullshit.
There seems to be a real hypocritical attitude of ”Yes, embrace your curves! But get rid of those thunder thighs, they chaff when you walk.” Not too mention that magazines will talk about the ”real woman” that has curves and belittle other women of different sizes who naturally do not have curves, and very thin frames and no chest at all, claiming that these are not ”real woman” and imply they are ghosts, or creatures of some sort? Belittling this type of woman does not make girls of a bigger weight feel any better, either. If anything, it just makes a large proportion of people feel bad - because there are many a girl who have sizes that means they have no cleavage or they have a big stomach, but not many girls with hourglass bodies and a slender yet voluminous physique.
We are not told to love our body, but to love only some parts of it. We are told what is desirable, and that we should accept what is desirable and what isn’t it. But then we are told to see ourselves as desirable - even after all this confidence crushing bullshit.
I don’t want to make anyone feel bad about their body, I don’t want to pronounce on what is, in general, an ‘acceptable’ size or shape. I want everyone and anyone, (and their aunt and their puppy) to feel like it’s ok to be the way they are, and if they’re already happy with it, then that’s even more ok.
I am not advocating unhealthy diets, whether it be starving yourself or piling in excessive junk food - But I will advocate a healthy mindset before anything else. It doesn’t matter if you have a little bit of fat where you shouldn’t, or have flat out cleavage, you don’t have to go about forcing yourself to change. Sure, eat better, exercise, try be healthy but don’t do it to improve your body’s physical look but the way it will make you feel in your brain, the more healthier of a person you will be.
I am not advocating unhealthy diets, whether it be starving yourself or piling in excessive junk food - But I will advocate a healthy mindset before anything else. It doesn’t matter if you have a little bit of fat where you shouldn’t, or have flat out cleavage, you don’t have to go about forcing yourself to change. Sure, eat better, exercise, try be healthy but don’t do it to improve your body’s physical look but the way it will make you feel in your brain, the more healthier of a person you will be.
A healthier mindset/happier person is always more important, always.
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